The last few times I tried to write some thing, I was unable to get on with the flow! Maybe I’ve been out of touch with writing, or maybe my mind wasn’t prepared to go with one, or maybe it was time for this one to be up on my blog.This has been a post I’ve been longing to write for quite a while.But for some odd reason or the other, it has been getting delayed.And finally the moment it is!
“Time is a healer, as time moves on..”, a saying so true to every letter.Its gonna be almost two years since the man I most loved, looked upon, admired and adored passed away. I never even thought that it would be possible at all to accept the fact that my grandfather is no more and I have to lead the rest of my life in his absence. (The adaptability of the human mind is sheer brilliance, which no thesis or research scholar can completely understand and decipher!).
Even before I go any further, I need to give complete credit to this great soul for he has made me what I am! Right from when I was only months old, I’ve always been his pet. I still fondly recall the days when he used to put me on his lap and sing, “Aanai aanai azhagar aanai.. azhagarum chokkarum erum aanai.. and see me and sing kutti aanaiku kombu molachidaam”. I grew up with my grandparents and eventually spent more time with them than with my parents.He used to sing slokas (Brahma murari surarchitha lingam, ananda roope nijabhootha roope, Ganesha pancharatnam et all.) to me and within days I used to learn them by heart and we used to recite them together ( he playing the role of the teacher and me repeating after.There was even one instance where he said “satthama paadu ma” (sing loudly) and me obediently raising my tone a little too loud. hehe… ) and he got them recorded.
He could offer a detailed opinion on any subject, be it Algebra or Allen Donald or Aristotle and it has indeed contributed to my general knowledge on a variety of subjects. We had a lot of interests in common and that indeed strengthened our bond and nurtured the great relationship we had. Magic Mama/Magic thatha as he is fondly called by a lot of near and dear ones, mesmerized three generations with his simple but effective jadoogar skills. It is unbelievable that his ring, poonal (sacred thread), hanky and shadow tricks have allured kids hailing from different generations. Right from my uncles and aunts to my nephews and nieces, there is not a person who has not been acquainted with the rat from hanky trick, the cut-thumb trick etc.
He has helped me with my essay writing contests, oratorical contests, made innumerable charts, not just for me but for my friends as well. Whatever be the time of the day, he has never hesitated to share my work load.Has helped me with the toughest of lessons and always patted my shoulder whenever I failed to do as well as I could have done. The crisp notes that he wrote on our Social Science, physics, chemistry, maths lessons are still preserved and it has been passed on to my juniors, so that they get benefited as well. As a matter of fact, he has sincerely polished my shoes for fourteen long years.
As a retired officer from the police department, he had a lot of tales and adventures to share. Although he shared each incident with the enthusiasm of a child and made it as humorous as possible, so that we could enjoy them completely, there was a lot of pain that he went through behind the curtains.Each incident did have another sad tale tied to it. Just like every sincere,honest government official, my grandad had to pay a huge price for being genuine and straight forward, causing a huge delay in his promotions, increments and leading to unexpected transfers.
Thanks to his efforts, the Chennai traffic is a lot more organized than any other city. He did establish a lot of signals in and around the city and succeeded in bringing down the accident count during his reign as the DSP-Traffic. He was a multi-faceted personality. He used to lead the cultural activities that were held as part of the celebrations. He was passionate about writing and he has written a few poems and skits in Tamil and English. He has written some brilliant plays which I staged in school as well.He was an ardent lover of the game of Chess and always neatly cut out the clippings of Harihara Nandanan’s Chess columns from the Hindu and pasted them in a notebook. We’ve played those great games of Paul Fischer,Kasparov,Anand etc over a cup of tea.I vividly recall the game where Fischer sacrificed his Queen and my granddad said,”Wait and watch the magic”, when I looked at him with astonishment. That was the day I realized a mere pawn can be more than enough a power to win a game, if used rightly. Although, I am no biggie in Chess, I learnt the game from him.He has taught me and my sister to corner the king with different permutations and combinations of powers.
Now that it is World cup time, I miss him. We enjoyed the game of cricket together. He taught me to interpret both cricket and tennis and appreciate the technicalities involved. Be it sports,politics,academics,art,music, he has helped me with his criticism in all walks of my life. He was the person who instilled the reading habit in me and did point out that my vocabulary had indeed improved tremendously even without my knowledge. I picked up books he suggested no matter whether I liked it or not because, I strongly believed that he recommended it for a reason.He has helped me build up my courage and to emerge as a mentally strong person. Where is my guiding light now??? 
He was a man who knew no inequalities. Having lost his mother when he was only 7, he has struggled all through his life. Brought up his brothers and sisters and settled all their lives. He treated his siblings’ children with even greater love than he had for his own. He knew no lust, no greed. He was such a broad minded soul who lived his life for others. All he knew was pure, unadulterated, unconditional love. We were his only solace after the many long years of struggle and suffering.
When my granddad was counting his last days in the hospital, the sweeper who sweeps my building on an everyday basis, enquired as to where he was and on hearing about his deteriorating condition, wanted to see him immediately, but my grandma said, they wouldn’t even let me see, how will they let you? He was utterly disappointed. These were the words he spoke to my grandmom, “I was his pet.Whenever, you scolded me, he used to be on my side and scold you for being rude to me. I can’t believe that he is dying”. He had won the love of the sweeper as well. Be it the sweeper, my dog, my uncle, my grandma, myself or my sister, he loved all of us equally. That was the greatness of this man.
Words cannot convey my love,gratitude and respect I have for him.He was not a materialistic man at all. All the more, he is not here physically, even if I want to gift him something (Thats something I wanted to do with my first salary! But for some reason it didn’t happen).A one page blog post cannot do enough justice to thank him for all he has done, but I’d like to use something that is readily available. If I can write decently well, it is all thanks to him and hence what more than a write up on my blog can I give him? I write this post from the bottom of heart and as I wrote it, one thing I observed was, words just flowed down from the bottom of my heart. through my fingers. There might be places with grammatical errors, logical flaws, lack of articulation etc, but this time I am not even going to re read the draft, because it comes right from my soul and when you do something right from your heart, everything else is forgiven.
Love you loads and I wish that you lived longer! Although, you are not physically present with us, I am sure your thoughts are with us and you will continue to inspire me and support me through all my endeavors.
